Addiction: It takes Persistence

Whether it’s a substance, alcohol, porn, gaming, phones.. exercise!! it doesn’t matter.

It can be a massively destructive force to us and those around us. It can destroy families, marriages, relationships, and friendships. It can mess with our heads, confidence, emotions, leaving us wondering if we are living the life we should be living.

It takes persistence to overcome or manage this behaviour, but persistence does not mean white-knuckling and sitting in a room alone just engaging in the behaviour.

Persistence means that we understand that there will be setbacks and relapses, but we gotta keep climbing that mountain and getting to the core of what is going on.

We gotta keep trying to find what works… coming up with a a holistic strategy that works for you to rebuild a life that is worth living.

Will power is a useful and important tool, but it is one tool in our tool belt. It takes more than just promising to never do it again. Only relying on will power can lead to a lot of shame for being ‘weak,’ which is like pouring gas on a fire… leading us to ‘use’ again.

You are not weak. Addiction has very little to do with being weak or strong… there is more at play that NEEDS to be explored.

Addiction… god damn addiction.

Inspirational quote about addiction on black background with swirling smoke.
Artwork of a person with hands on face under text about addiction, emphasizing understanding its impact.
Artistic depiction of a person's head filled with a stormy sky, lightning, and clouds, with a figure sitting on a bench underneath, overlaid with the text about addiction and the inner world.
Collage of addictions: keyboard with 'Porn' key, person gaming, man exercising, people with alcohol, child with tablet, woman smoking.
Blurry grayscale image of a person in motion with accompanying text about avoiding trauma and emotions.
Man with fingers on temples and chaotic scribbles around his head, illustrating mental confusion. Text above reads 'Identifying triggers with curiosity & compassion is crucial.'
Person climbing stairs in shadowy light with text about goal setting: abstinence, management, control.
Confused person in front of chalkboard with winding paths and arrows
Motivational quote about accepting relapses and persisting, with an illustration of self-acceptance in a mirror and silhouette of person climbing a hill.
Inspirational quote on relapse and authenticity with dark background.

Addiction: Rat Park?!

It is not just about will power. Back in the day, there used to be this idea that the ‘drug’ was the problem, so the solution was to just not do the drug… get over the withdrawals and you will be fine.

Check out this video here: RAT PARK

This led to the feeling that if you cannot quit a drug, you are weak because you don’t have control over your body. However, this didn’t seem to be the case. Even after getting over withdrawals, folks would return to their addictive behaviour.

Rat Park changed this way of looking at addiction. It got folks asking, ‘what is at the root of addiction’. What are the forces that are driving us to have that urge to use?

Are you in a steel cage, isolated, lonely, cut off from nature, exercise, healthy food… from ourselves or do you have a ‘park’? And if so, is there anything missing from your park? We need to look at our lives with curiosity and compassion…

This is key to understanding what causing that urge…

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Comparison of two scenarios related to addiction. Left: a rat drinking from a spout. Right: three rats interacting with hearts and balloons, suggesting a social setting. Text asks about the link to addiction.
Infographic on an experiment with a rat, detailing addiction causes. It includes text about a rat in a steel cage with two water bottles, one with cocaine, and shows results of overdose. Includes a claim that drugs cause addiction.
Infographic discussing Experiment 1 mindset where drugs are seen as the problem. Includes images of rats and cages associated with drug solutions like 'drug war' and 'just say no.' Results mention shame, guilt, and a mindset of weakness.
Illustration of Rat Park experiment showing colorful rats, play areas, and text explaining the setup with regular and cocaine water, emphasizing social environment's role in addiction.
Infographic titled "Experiment 2" discussing addiction. It emphasizes building a life worth living through a holistic approach addressing root causes like alienation. It warns that anything used to avoid emotions could be a drug if living disconnected. Includes an illustration of rats with hearts.
Infographic comparing a rat in a solitary cage vs. social rat park, with text about persistence, curiosity, compassion, acceptance.

Addiction: Trauma and our Nervous System

Close-up of a teary eye in black and white

Trauma from either a major adverse event, chronic traumatic experiences, or passed down from generations could be playing a major role in your addictive behaviour.

It has been found that because of these experiences, we can get triggered in seemingly safe environments and our bodies and primitive brains take over, overwhelming our systems with emotions, memories, and/or a fight, flight, or freeze response.

This reaction, meant to help us survive in this world, may not be working for us.

Addictive behaviour can be a VERY effective way of ‘calming’ or ‘dealing with’ this reaction. However, this way of coping can lead to harmful issues in your life, impacting your mood, relationships, work,

school, confidence, motivation and other areas of your life.

This is very difficult to work on and it takes time to develop more tools in your belt. However, it is key to managing your addictive behaviour!

There are some really influential works that can help you understand this idea and how to work on this in your life:

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk - this book is a massively important work to understand how trauma can impact our present selves. The body’s goal is to keep us safe before the wise part of our brains can interpret the situation. This ‘keeping us safe’ can often negatively disrupt our lives. The body truly does keep the score.

If you don’t got time for the whole book, check out this video:

https://youtu.be/iTefkqYQz8g?si=PfiwxIU9icL3y5zO

In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction by Gabor Mate - the definition of a trauma-informed human who has shone a big spotlight on how trauma plays a pivotal role in addiction and what it takes as a society and individuals to address this… a beautiful and must-read book.

If you don’t have time, check out this video:

https://youtu.be/O5jmsJAClpw?si=ymT9RUbrgzi6f1EJ


Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory by Deb Dana - this book has very practical strategies for how to reconnect to your core self when triggered by trauma.